On weddings and Questions

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

It has been quite some time since I've written anything here. Masyaallah. I just did not have any ilham to write anything. However, today I went for a close friend's wedding and solemnization and I felt the need to write.

Although I am sad that I didn't get to take a photo with her, I am happy that at least I got to make doa for her during her solemnization, to ask Allah for blessings for her future. As Muslims, we all have alot to work on and improve so I hope that marriage is one way for her to become a better Muslimah... insyaallah. Hopefully she'll don the hijab someday too then at least I won't be the only one wearing it when we go out.  =)

I found a website (Ar Rihla)  with 100 Pre-Marital Questions that couples getting married ought to ask themselves. Hopefully the newly married couple have addressed some of these to secure a happy marriage in the future. As for me, I too hope that I can answer these questions someday with Hubtobe. Heh.

I doa for the best for them and that I pray that He blesses me with the same rezeki soon. 

 

Amin

Solution to Poverty and the Global Crises

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Today in class we were supposed to think of solutions to the global crises that plague the world today. Most of these include people living in Third World developing countries who survive on less than $1-2 a day. These countries are also subjected to a debt regime in which the only way for their government to borrow money from IMF or the World Bank is at exorbitant interest rates and also with strict conditions for use.

These countries then become entrenched in debt because the money that they earn from their GDP is usually used to repay back ONLY the interest rates... and then they have to borrow more money to repay their previous loans... and they don't have any left to invest into their economy.

So it came as a surprise to me when one of my non-Muslim classmates suggested that the world should follow the Islamic Banking way of loans and business partnerships. He was then second by my Professor who is also a Muslim, who said that Islamic Banking practices take a shared responsibility approach with business entrepreneurs. As such, they do profit and lose together with their business partners.

It struck me then at that moment that if right from the start, we had followed the Islamic way of life; follow their banking system, their political system and everything... life would be more peaceful. Our Prophet Muhammad s.a.w had given us all the solutions to the problems that would come after his death and yet we are blinded and unguided in our practices.

Islam is NOT backwards neither is it progressive. What I mean is that it is always constant and applicable till the end of time. If only we stop to think and remember Him and his prophets.

GATHERING THE RAINDROPS

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

A friend of mine sent me this email and I thought I'd share it here. =)

GATHERING THE RAINDROPS

This is so unfair. I keep up with my salah and try my best to not get annoyed with people around me. I help my friends and family without asking anything in return. Alhamdulillah, I'm better off than so many others. I'm not asking to be in euphoria, but am I so wrong for wanting things to go right for once?

Whenever I pray, I make duaa for myself and my loved ones. The next thing I know, the prayers I made for others are answered Alhamdulillah.

But what about my own struggles? It is bittersweet seeing everyone around me relieved while I am suffering.

"Selfish" and "jealous" are the first words that "I" tell "me" when I get over my moment of frustration. I remind myself that Allah will not put me in a situation that I cannot handle. I tell myself that another person's good fortune does not diminish my good fortune or potential for increased blessings, so I should not feel despondent when I see others in a good state while I am in a not-so-good state.

The hardships we go through, financial, social, or emotional, are all a test from Allah. It was reported by Tirmithi that the Prophet (PBUH), said: "If Allah loves a people, He tests them."

We need to be patient in the face of our trials. Patience is more than tapping our feet while waiting in line, or smiling on the outside while churning up negative thoughts. Patience is part of tawakkul, reliance on Allah.

Patience is refusing to sink into despair in the face of obstacles. Patience is staying clam when every fiber of your being is telling you to panic. Patience is saying Alhamdulillah when we are sad.

We may not see it, but expressions such as "Ugh, not again!" or "Why me?" or "This is always my luck!" are very egotistical and come from a place of arrogance. It is as if we think that we are so perfect, so deserving that we should be able to demand an easy, stress-free life. But that is missing the point. We are tested with hardships in this life so that we may return to Allah with a faith much stronger than before, and at a higher stations.

Prophet Ayoub (Job) is the exemplary figure of a patient servant of Allah. After he was tested with the loss of his wealth and the death of his children, Satan came to him in the form of a man offering his sympathies, hoping that Prophet Ayyub would become angry with Allah: "The circumstances under which your children died were sad. Surely, your Lord is not rewarding you properly for all your prayers."

Prophet Ayyub replied: "Allah sometimes gives and sometimes takes. He is sometimes pleased and sometimes displeased with our deeds. Whether a thing is beneficial or harmful to me, I will remain firm in my belief and remain thankful to my Creator."

This is the backbone of life. Plants cannot grow unless the rain falls. Ice cold water will never be refreshing if we never got tried in the sun. As one of my favorite quotes says:

"Hardships make us strong. Problems give birth to wisdom. Sorrows cultivate compassion. Those who have suffered the most will become the happiest." When we are faced with difficulties, we should make the best of them and remind ourselves that nothing is possible without the mercy of Al-Basit (The Expander).

When Prophet Ayyub was taking a bath, a group of locusts fell on him. Instead of reacting with irritation, he gathered them in his garment (they are a delicacy among some peoples). Allah called to him and said: "Have I not made you too rich to need what you see?" He said: "Yes, O Lord! But I cannot shun Your Blessings" (Bukhari).

When the rain falls don’t complain. Catch the droplets on your tongue and praise Allah for His blessings.

(Courtesy: Al Jumuah Magazine)
 

Remember us when we are frail and weak...

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

In my previous entry I talked about children... and now I want to talk about elderly. These two groups of people are at the extremes of the continuum of life and as such, they represent the group that needs the most love and delicate care...

Today, my mother told me to be prepared that my grandmother would be staying with us soon. In fact, we have been preparing for it- we're painting the walls and re-arranging the furniture to make space for her. We are all expected to accommodate, although we know what additional strains and costs it would mean but we do not mind. I for one, do not see her as a burden, but as a blessing in disguise for her prayers are more valuable than ours and Allah might shower us with more rezeki. Insyaallah.

As such, it makes me very sad indeed when my other relatives seem to consider her a real burden and keep shifting all the responsibilities around... even their children are selfishly hanging to their comforts and refuse to sacrifice to allow an old woman some space. It hurts me deeply and I don't know if feeling angry at them is the right emotion... for sometimes I do feel pity for them for they do not see that their actions do not please Him.

We quietly wait for her arrival soon. Oh Allah, grant us all the strength to take care of her and grant us all health to make this possible. Amin.

Having Children

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

To Allah belongs the kingdom of the heavens and the earth.
He creates what He wills.
He bestows female (offspring) upon whom He wills,
and bestows male (offspring) upon whom He wills.
Ash-Shura 42:49

An ex-colleague of mine just gave birth a few days ago just slightly after subuh, to a healthy baby boy. The baby has his father's eyes and his mother's dimples. So young already smiling for the camera! I pray that they raise him to be a good Muslim. Insyaallah.

I was telling Hubtobe how amazing it is that a baby of about the length of your arm could fit inside a woman's body. Not to mention that my ex-colleague has a very very small frame. I remembered how she had fallen sick when her body was stretching her beyond her ability to take the pain. But Hubtobe says that all those are God's secrets. Yes, that's true... and that's why it is marvelous.

Sometimes I am scared of children; the idea of carrying them around and then the pain of delivering them... and then the heartache when you raise them and they talk back to you [and I would know]. But I guess all these are just a part of the trials that Allah has set for us Muslims. Here's a good link.

To quote from that website, it says:

Muslims are frequently tested by Allah s.w.t. Your children are a test or trial for you, and your actions or lack of actions will be judged by Allah swt alone.  Do not raise your child simply based on what your family or peers thinks you should do. Do not fear the judgment of mankind, but of Allah, s.w.t., alone.

My most favourite is perhaps this-

Allah's Messenger said, "The believing man or woman continues to have affliction in person, property and children so that they may finally meet Allah, free from sin." (Tirmidhi)

One can only pray that parents have raised their children to the best of their abilities... but children... when you grow up and begin to learn, do not blame your parents if they have brought you up wrong... but seek to learn more about the truth so that you do not repeat your parents' mistakes.

A simpson take on PhDs and Grad students

 "In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

In this hilarious clip, the Simpsons show some of the ideas that people have about grad students and PhD students. It's a sad but true phenomenon and it's something that I should keep in mind too.

However, in Singapore, it is almost the opposite mentality. Grad students are coveted (of course in the right fields) but sometimes they can be seen as too 'expensive' commodities in the labour market.

Nevertheless, it's something worth remembering about our quest to seek knowledge... and that's why I'm putting up this link. Education should be pursued in itself and not because of other material rewards it may bring. Remember always that rezeki is from Allah and He chooses to give it to whomever He wants.

The Simpsons - Comments about PhDs and Grad Students. [HQ]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XViCOAu6UC0&feature=related

Unknown

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

My mother just got home from the doctor... and she told me that he suspects that she has dengue fever. I'm actually very surprised as to how that is possible. Our plants do not have water holders below them, meaning that water drains out. We don't leave water in pails... so I don't know how she got it. -sigh-

It saddens me on two fronts when I heard this news- first is of course for my mother. She is still young... and so am I and my brothers. Although I can do things by myself now, I do wish for her to be with us as we grow older.

Although her ways are not always the best, it does not mean that I do not love her.

Secondly, I am sad for myself. If my mother is hospitalized... that leaves ALL the housework to me. And that is on top of my studies. The men in the house really can't do much or won't do much rather. I'd have to wash all their disgusting clothes when they could actually do it themselves.

I pray that the blood test is negative and that she doesn't really have dengue and that the rash is just an allergy to something. -sigh- But if it's positive... then it has been decreed by Allah...

Everything happens for a reason... and so I have to accept it.

Planning....

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Alhamdullilah, my recess week is over. Somehow I find myself at a loss with so much free time that scheduling seems redundant. Today is a good Monday morning and so I have a few things to write down just for my own remembrance:

1) I am grateful to have my professor supervisor; even though he is very demanding and very difficult to please. He is very prompt in his replies to my emails and always gives me questions and pointers that make me think deeply. Insyaallah, under his guidance, I will have a better planning exercise and I will produce a good thesis paper. I pray that Allah will make this journey for me a little easier.

2) Today I saw a friend posting something on facebook that went like this- If you have a target to get wed, why not also have a target to go to haj?
It struck me that one. Of course, I would love to go to haj. Another friend commented that it's not just the spiritual and financial preparations but also freeing up time. Hubtobe and I have sort of planned [though hazy] that we should go to umrah, or haj before/during our holidays before we see the world. This is of course subject to whether we marry before or after my masters. But I do so wish to have some time for ourselves to travel and do our umrah and/or haj before the kids come. But then again, I found out about someone who planned to go to haj after her third child has weaned off and they would go before they have a fourth child. Masyaallah.... and they planned this at the very start of their marriage. =)

3) I plan to take it one day at a time. Somehow things are getting harder for me, since that day. Each day to rebuild myself and to have a stronger faith that Allah is the best of all planners.

Insyaallah...

Amin...

Humbling reminder

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Today I came across this ayat in the Quran and thought it would be best to share it here. It reminded me about the Greatness of Allah and how we as humans must never forget that we need Him but He doesn't need us:

أَلَمْ تَرَ أَنَّ اللَّهَ خَلَقَ السَّمَاوَاتِ وَالْأَرْضَ بِالْحَقِّ ۚ إِن يَشَأْ يُذْهِبْكُمْ وَيَأْتِ بِخَلْقٍ جَدِيدٍ

 

Seest thou not that Allah created the heavens and the earth in Truth? If He so will, He can remove you and put (in your place) a new creation?

   وَمَا ذَ‌ٰلِكَ عَلَى اللَّهِ بِعَزِيزٍ

 Nor is that for Allah any great matter.

Just two lines... but so powerful. Masyaallah. I could literally 'hear' Allah saying the last line to Mankind. I actually said 'wow' after reading that line. It's like a slap to my face perhaps, as a reminder that our existence here is only because Allah wills it. Any difficulties and any ease which He gives to our lives are His decisions alone.

This reminds me of a video from youtube that I watched about a poor, blind old lady whom when interviewed about her poverty, never stopped praising God. Here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IFqfVIxGPlY&feature=player_embedded

One of the questions that the reporter asked was: So Ummi, do you have any children? Do they come and visit you? And she said- Allah is always with me, I do not need anyone else.

Masyaallah... truly, the most grateful are those who get so little but are thankful for so much. I pray for that old lady and I also pray that I could attain that level of thankfulness for everything in my life.

Wallahualam Bissawab

Getting into the Groove

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I'm currently recovering from food poisoning and so this week I'm going to be a little slow in thought and actions. After one hour of teaching or studying, it just drains me so much! But before I go and rest, I just wanna lay out some thoughts about the thesis paper I'm crafting. 

Truth is, the process is harder than it seems. And my organized self finds it so difficult to move in a zigzag manner when I see the research process as a linear manner. It involves alot of going out into the field, talking to people, then reviewing the literature, then reviewing your research question again and again and again. That's just so exhausting! 

They say that it is too early to determine anything, therefore, I should not be stuck in my decision to be final. -sigh- I guess as the more experienced professors, they'd know better.

I've got to think alot on my own now... and then I'm going to try and formulate some questions and begin my pilot interviews soon. I'm so shy and I find it difficult to talk to strangers really... Yeah... that means I better get that $150 voice recorder.

Alright, time to rest. This research process is something new for me... but if I find it to my liking, insyaallah then, Academia is for me.  =)

Wallahualam bissawab.

Shukran for this remedy...

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I am thankful to Brother Hamid for posting this entry here.

But I'd like to put up something he shared about the Prophet s.a.w; a beautiful do'a that is full of sincerity, humily and total subordination to Allah... I cried when I read this and i find it so humbling that I am crippled for words to describe it.

 

“O Allah! Unto You do I complain of my weakness, of my helplessness and of my lowliness before men. O most Merciful of the merciful. O Lord of the weak and my Lord too. Into whose hands have you entrusted me? Unto some far off stranger who receives me with hostility? Or unto a foe whom you have empowered against me? I care not, so long as You are not angry with me. But Your favouring help, that were for me the broader way and the wider scope. I take refuge in the light of Your countenance whereby all darknesses are illuminated and all things of this world and the next are rightly ordered, lest You make descend Your anger upon me or lest Your wrath beset me. Yet it is Yours to reproach until You are well pleased. There is no power and no might except through Thee.”
 

Masyaallah...

And something to remind myself....

When someone rejects you in any aspect of life, do not get disheartened, rather rejoice within yourself saying to yourself Allahukaber! Worst could have happened, Alhumdulillah! It didn't happened. My Creator plan's are, indeed better than those of his best of creations (human beings).Its better to get rejected at first place than to get divorced later (in every aspect of life).What have I lost? Nothing! What belongs to me after all that i may loose.


I accept all that He has decreed upon me for He knows best what I know not. 

He has given me this opportunity to increase my faith in Him and search for His love; a love above all else. 

I put all my faith in His plans for they are the best for me and for my religion.

This is how I feel right now...

Soulmates; Is there 'The One' for you?

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Let me start off first with this ayat from the Quran in hopes that we are always grateful to Him for everything and that we are put far away from those who sin, even if it is within ourselves.

 رَبِّ بِمَا أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيَّ فَلَنْ أَكُونَ ظَهِيرًا لِّلْمُجْرِمِينَ

O My Lord! Since You have bestowed favours on me, I will never more be a helper for sinners (28:17).

So, to the topic of the day- 

Does the concept of 'The One' exist in the Muslim vocabulary? How do we make sense of this when Muslim men are allowed to marry up to four wives and that technically, it is forbidden for Muslims to date or see their future spouse before marriage?

Marriage is such an important step that our blessed Prophet (s) spoke of marriage as being `half the religion': `Whoever has married has completed half of his religion; therefore let him fear Allah in the other half!' (Bayhaqi)

This begs the question- Why? 

There's a very simple reason for this. Yes, there is 'The One' for us when we seek marriage with someone... and that 'One' is Allah. 

When I first thought about this idea; it seemed counter-intuitive but then I began to ask myself this: Why do we do anything? We do everything in this world because of Allah and for His pleasure alone. 

Therefore, when you meet someone who reminds you of Allah and who loves you solely for Allah, then you know that this person is therefore right for you. He/she becomes the channel or the bond that helps you escalate your love for Allah through your love for each other. Loving your spouse is loving Allah's creation and thus loving Allah. Furthermore, if your spouse follows the sunnahs of the Prophet closely; the remembrance of our Prophet s.a.w is also another way to build our love for Allah. 

Therefore, do not be swindled by the popularized notions of love professed on Valentine's Day. This [sick] notion of finding 'the one' has not stopped divorce from happening; in fact it has increased the rate of divorce, esp in Singapore. Why? Coz couples realise 'oh, he/she's not the one. Move on'.

‎ 

وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِّتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً ۚ إِنَّ فِي ذَ‌ٰلِكَ لَآيَاتٍ لِّقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ

And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect [30:21]

In another entry here, I mentioned that these 'Signs' always seek to return to the source, which is Allah, the Creator. So what does this tell us? Allah's Signs of His love for us is when we feel love for our spouse because He had put it there. But this love belongs to Him and as such, we must constantly remember to return that love to Him; through our daily ibadahs and also through our daily interactions with our family, our spouse, our children.

It's very simple really. Insyaallah, He will guide those who believe.

O Allah, grant the Muslim youth (men) pious and righteous wives, and make from their offspring Muslims who will rise the banner of Islam, and carry the Quran (in their hearts), and who will order good and forbid evil.


O Allah, grant the daughters of the Muslims pious and righteous husbands, and make them pious, obedient (to Allah and their husbands), repentance, not showing themselves (wearing hijjab).


O Allah, grant the Muslim youth (men) the chastity of Prophet Yusuf (AS), and grant the daughters of the Muslims the purity of Mary (Mariam (AS)).


Amin

May this help us in trying times

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I found this on youtube but looked up the translation somewhere else. May this help us through the trying times. Insyaallah.
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSp_LDfq8HQ
 
It's entitled: Bantulah Aku Melawan Nafsu (arabic)-Mawaddah  [Help me fight my Nafsu- by Mawaddah]
 
 
Do help me fight this lust


I had fought my lust every moment

I tried many times yet I failed

I didn't give up and I fought again

But I couldn't afford

I failed at last



O Lord, do help me, make it easy for me

To fight this lust that is destroying me

Maybe I'm not halted to reach You

Please help me Lord

Have mercy on me, don't let me be



Lord, do help me

Have mercy on me, don't let me be, do help me always

I don't give up, I keep on fighting by hoping help from You



Should You let me be on my own

I'll ceaselessly be in the sinful valley

O Lord, lust and satan always irritate me

Everyday they hold grudge on me whenever I want to be diligent to You



Don't leave me alone

Facing satan and my lust

I want to obey You, I want Your Please

Should You let me be, I'll be down then

Lord I'll try again fighting lust by Your help and Your blessing Lord



In this prayer I count on You

Do bestow upon me love and fear to You

As my guardians from my lust

Isn't it Your Promise to Your slaves?



O Lord, help me focus in my prayer

May I could feel Your Mightiness

Till I see everything is small, but You

By that feeling I hope at last I'll be able to fight satan and my cunning lust



Lord, in my prayer, clean up my soul, make feeble my lust

Do save myself, cultivate feeling of slavery in me

Make it stay put for my entire life

Syukur Alhamdulillah for this application!

 

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I am thankful for the Azan application from SearchTruth because not only does it provide worldwide timing for prayers but it also tells you the direction of the kiblah.

It is very important for people like my dad who works on the ship for most times of the year. I am very thankful that I was able to download this app into his phone and I know that he has been putting it to good use. For example, the other time he was in Korea, it really helped him prepare for the sahur at 3am instead of the 5am Singapore time.


    

    

I really love the app and I really encourage others to download it too since it is for free! But even if it's not, I would definitely download it. May Allah reward the people who came up with this application and may they receive berkahs everytime we use it. Amin.

Death of an influential woman

 "In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Mdm Kwa Geok Choo, otherwise known as Mrs Lee Kwan Yew passed away this afternoon at 5.40pm in her home. See here. Even though she is absent in most of our history books; I feel that she embodies the saying: behind every successful man lies a woman.

It takes a very special kind of woman to understand the difficulties that her husband has to go through as a political leader. She must have kept many secrets and had managed her household well while working in her own law firm.

However, because she was not Muslim, I can only offer my condolences to her family. I don't suppose it is right for me to make doa for her; for she has already returned to the Creator and all is now in His hands to decide.

May she rest in peace.

Role Models for our Daughters

 

 "In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

As always, the only things that are meaningful on Facebook are my Daily Islamic reminders. Here's a post that I'd like to share:

What do you teach your daughters? Do you allow them to act like Lady Gaga, Lindsay Lohan, Rhianna and others? Or do you encourage them to aspire to be the best of women. We are told, "The best women of mankind are four: Mariam daughter of `Imran, Assiya wife of Pharaoh, Khadija daughter of Khuwailid, and Fatima the daughter of the Messenger of Allah" (Bukhari/Muslim). Give your daughters proper role models!

Of course, with this said; it is also equally important that the mother acts as a role model as well. While we tell our daughters to follow the path of these wonderful Muslim women, we must also uphold all those values that these women in history have shown to us.

I expect alot from my children (insyaallah, when I have them). I expect them to be good muslims who establish regular prayers and fast and who have equal interest in acquiring knowledge of both this world and the next. I know they will be naughty and stubborn at times and I know they will be bombarded by all these bad influence of Lady Gaga, Rhianna and the likes. It will be hard to raise our daughters and sons in the coming future, but as parents, we must always try our best.

Always remember that our daughters will one day become mothers who will then have their own daughters and the cycle continues. Women have always been responsible for the socialization of children and also the imparting of values and knowledge.

Being a teacher

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Some time back, a friend of mine shared an incident about how she met her former professor who, when told that she was training to be a teacher, said that 'you wasted my time'. That must really hurt my friend alot.


This friend of mine is a really intelligent muslimah and one of the sisters whom I look up to. So when I read about her defense on teaching, I felt conflicted. One one hand, I agree with her professor that after four years of training to be a journalist, it becomes such a waste that one cannot contribute back into the field that lacks so much female muslim voices. But on the other hand, I agree and I also support this sister in her reasons for becoming a teacher.

I quote: And now after graduation, at this juncture, as I reflect upon my role as God's Creation and in the grander scheme of things, I feel that being a teacher is the best way for me to make some change in this wonky world. Many people say teachers become teachers because they feel the most powerful in the classroom, because they have 'no other jobs', because because because... But I'd like to say that the feeling of being able to bring younger individuals on a journey, to make them learn and learn with them, is a beautiful one.

As I seat here at NIE, trying to comprehend what has just happened to me, I realise I have the better option of being in control of my learning. That God has given me the best faculties to make sense of this world. And I hope the person realised I actually didn't waste the person's time.

In fact, the person has helped me to realise the dimensions of the larger goal I have in life.

I didn't waste your time. You were one of the people who made me into a better someone.

Masyaallah... [by the way, if you're reading this, please don't mind that I quote this from you]

As for me, many people ask me "What are you going to do after you graduate?" and seriously I don't like being asked that... Whatever I want to be or choose to want to be, are all hinged upon Allah's decisions...

Many people assume that I would also go into teaching... and many more tell me that I should. And I tell them that I cannot teach children whom I have no emotional connection with... I cannot teach them for a year or two or three and watch them go away into their own lives without me beside them. But I can teach adults... because they are responsible for their own learning and they are of equal standing to argue with. Surely one cannot expect a 7 year old child to defend himself on why he chooses to colour the bread black instead of brown or beige?

As a woman and as a Muslim, I feel there is more that I can do for the world and I want to contribute back with a greater force than if I were to be a teacher. There are already many sisters in the teaching fraternity... but how many have stepped up to be leaders of the country? or leaders of the judicial systems? win a Nobel prize? Not many...

I'm not saying I am hoping to do all those things... but for me... that's a starting point to consider the value of my future.

Alhamdullilah, we made it back in ONE piece!

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Today, my friends and I did our yearly visiting to each others' house... only that this year I am driving. =) 

I must say that driving the whole day is very tiring... especially when you have to focus on the road and on the conversations and on a 101 things at the same time.

But, Alhamdulillah, I managed to drive relatively calm, with no mishaps. My friends were so comfortable they ended up sleeping... but I am grateful for my friend sitting beside me who kept me alert by talking constantly.

I think I mentioned in another entry about how I'm so grateful to have friends such as these. They all pray on time and never miss their prayers. They are really good influence- socially, culturally and religiously. Truly, I am almost a complete opposite of what I used to be back in year one... and yet my friends stayed true to me; always patient and never judging.

Anyway, today at one of my friend's house, we played this game called Kalimaat by Baba Ali. Here. It's kinda like charades... but with a twist. And it also tests our knowledge on Islam as well as our memory skills. It turned out that I do have a good memory. Hahahaha. But what amazed me was that, 4 years back, I probably wouldn't know how to describe in a charades the word 'tirmidzhi' or 'miswak' or 'caliphs'. Yes... I am that embarrassingly un-learned. Masyaallah.

But Alhamdullillah, I am a better muslim now and I have my friends to thank for that. I only pray that our friendship will last till we have our own kids someday. Amin.  

Dilemma of the Knowledge Seeker

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Masyaallah, this is such a belated entry! But before I forget, here are some of the pointers that I took down from the forum held at the Sultan Mosque. 

 

One of the speakers, Ustadz Noor Deros in particular really impresed me, because of the level of his intellectual provocations. He is currently an Executive at the Muslim Thinker Department at En-Naem Mosque. He graduated from Madrasah Al-Aljunied Al-Islamiah, Singapore and had furthered his studies at Al-Azhar University with a Bachelor of Arts, Islamic Creed & Philosophy.

So his main argument about seeking knowledge is to take it as a challenge; demystify yourself and see what is beyond the apparent.

For example: When Allah commanded His creations to prostrate to Nabi Adam a.s., what exactly were they prostrating to?

“So, when I have made him and have breathed into him of My Spirit, do ye fall down, prostrating yourselves unto him. So the angels fell prostrate, all of them together.”

- Al-Hijr 29-30

Therefore, Iblis who refused to prostrate was only seeing what was apparent; i.e. the physical body of Nabi Adam a.s. and not the spirit that had been infused in his body by Allah s.w.t.

To which Ustadz Noor then explained that the root of 'Ilm is 'alam which can roughly be translated as our natural surroundings or in his defination 'a sign'. And indeed our surroundings are signs of Allah's creations and thus it is apt.

عِلْمٌ  comes from the word عَلَمٌ which means; a sign.

And the spirit [ which Allah has breathed into Man] reads these signs and seek to return to It's source which is Allah. Masyaallah....

And how can this be further explained?

When we learn, we are exposed to   العلم

which can mean two things- knowledge

or it can mean the Introduction.

When Allah shares with us His secrets and knowledge, He is actually introducing Himself. In His kitab-kitab, in His creations and so on.

Therefore, if you see that knowledge is ultimately a method to learn about Allah and be closer to Him, then you have succeeded in gaining that knowledge as a form of ibadah.

Insyaallah....

Children are watching [hearing and listening]

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Recently, a friend of mine shared this video with me about how children are always imitating their parents; watching their every movement and listening to their words. To their subjective consciousness, their parents are reality and everything that their parents do or say are usually right.


Here's the video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3WioZcjbys

Here's a quote I took from this website about mistakes that parents make when raising children:

Many parents do not realize how observant and absorbing a child is. They will talk in front of him forgetting that he is present, almost as though he is a piece of furniture - deaf and dumb. But a child listens and absorbs, often ponders over and sometimes repeats, what he hears. Thus when a parent says something about a particular thing or person, and then says something different to someone else, the child is introduced to being two-faced. A parent may rant against someone, and say he dislikes him immensely. Yet when he meets the same person, he is very nice to him and shows no sign of his anger. Although to a certain degree this may be necessary, for we cannot show our disagreements openly, it is not necessary to indulge in hypocritical behavior. A hypocrite is one who will be very sweet to the face, but will stab from the back. Imam Muhammad al-Baqir (a) says: The worst of the servants (of Allah) is one who has two faces and two tongues. He praises his brother-in-faith when he is present, and eats him when he is absent.

A child should not be exposed to such behavior. He believes that his parent is always right, and to see such two faced behavior is a disillusionment and a wrong message.

The reason why I'm writing this entry is perhaps because I am disturbed by some of the things that I've been observing for the past year or so.


- It saddens me a lot when parents don't insist on prayers being done on time; skipping prayers when it suits their timetable and doing it only when they have the time. If one doesn't feel crippled after he/she overslept and missed fajr prayers, then he/she is probably needs to improve on their iman and ibadah.


-being vicious, back-biting individuals is another. Talking about others' downfall, calling your own children stupid or other degrading terms serve as a kind of doa for them. -sigh-


Today someone said this to me: "If you want to try to islamify me, then you are better off going to the jungle and making muslims out of the natives. I am already a Muslim, why do you need to tell me what is right or wrong?"


Astaghfiruallahal'azim...


Hubtobe once told me that when a makmum had approached one of the Imams at a mosque to correct his Al-Fatihah and the Imam was driven to tears; humbled by his minute mistake.


No one escapes from mistakes and every criticism or advice [whether you think its right or wrong] should be used as a point of reference to improve yourself.


The Holy Prophet (s) is reported to have said, “The inheritance of Allah, the exalted, from His believing servant, is a child who will worship Him after him (his death).”
 

Alhamdulillah, Allah has opened my heart and my mind to correct the wrongs that my parents have influenced me in the past. I am not discrediting them, for they have raised me well; sending me to madrasah and quran reading classes. I only pray that they could increase their Iman and remember Allah at all times. Insyaallah, we can all be better Muslims...

Amin


Allah knows best.

Humbling reminder.

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I have nothing much to say today except that you read this article:

http://hamidswisdom.blogspot.com/2010/09/nothing-is-wrong-with-this-marriage.html

It really humbles me, masyaallah. May Allah bless the writer for sharing this anecdote with us.

Out with the folks

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

It was a normal Tuesday.


Mom decided to head to IMM and do some grocery shopping which I and Hubtobe absolutely LOVE! Only that Hubtobe has been so busy lately that we haven't had time to do much grocery shopping together these days.

So me, my mom and my dad went down to the Giant hypermart to do our groceries and my dad was saying how he was craving for Thai food. So we decided to go to Bali Thai which I personally recommended to my parents. And indeed the food was superb and service was excellent.

Here are some of the photos of what we ate:

[right]

Pineapple rice,
Mango salad
Thai green curry

[below]

Tom Khai Ga- similar to Tom yam except that coconut milk has been added. Yum!

Remembrance

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

A friend of mine of facebook posted this:

A sign of someone whom Allah loves is that when you see him/her, you remember Allah." - Hina Khan-Mukhtar

And it made me think of all the people whom reminds me of Allah... Masyaallah...

Weird Questions

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I think my mother is ready to see me married off. =)
She asked me why have I not asked Hubtobe to come? Lol. Then she goes to say, she doesn't think his mom would come here. Well... you'd never know. =)

Lately she's been wanting to ask me two weird questions.

She hasn't asked me this question yet because she says she's afraid I'm going to scold her and/or ignore her.  

But I know what that question is:

Why did I break up with my ex-bf?

I am surprised she's even asking me this question because I thought she of all people would know best. But then again, I am a very private person with my emotions especially to my family members.

Then the second question is:

Why do I like Hubtobe so much? He's [put in all imperfections here] but why do you still like him ah?

Again, I'm surprised she doesn't see why. =)

Another thing she's worried is because Hubtobe and I are quite related and she worries that if we were to break off, then it'd be awkward if we met each other at family events etc. I wish she would not think like that... because Allah knows what's best for us and our religion. If He deems it best for our family, then it is and it will happen. 

Allah has answered both our prayers. I know He has. Only that I don't know what's that answer. But I believe that Allah knows best and in Him alone I put all my faith and trust. In Him alone I put my hopes and my dreams. And for Him alone I strive for excellence in all knowledge, my love, my family and my life. 

Amin.

Hurt

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

It's the second day of Eid and things are not looking good at home. Ya Allah, please forgive me for saying this but my dad is a constant complainer and never helps out around the house. It gets to a point where even I am so frustrated with him that I wish I could just raise my voice.

He's been complaining that no one wants to come visit us for Eid... but when he found out we were having guests, he gave an excuse to go out so he wouldn't have to entertain them. Astaghfiruallah... He bitches [yes he does] about every single relative of my mom's side who annoys him or whom he's jealous of etc. One of my uncles was talking about his grandson who made it to one of the top junior colleges in Singapore and my dad bitched later in the car about how arrogant my uncle was. And I was like.... get a grip please! He was just proud of his grandson! How many people can make it to that school? 

He complains about the food, he complains about housework when asked to do... He complains about every little thing and it's making me very annoyed. He keeps quarreling with my mother and knowing how tired my mother is from working so hard, it makes me very angry and hurt.

I wish I could tell him that our Prophet Muhammad s.a.w helps out with the housework, never complains about his food and above all never bitches about other people even when they were unkind to him. But it is not my place to tell my father that or is it?
It makes me scared to get married sometimes when this happens. =(

Eid Mubarak!

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Alhamdulliah, Allah has allowed us to live through the Ramadhan to meet Syawal. 

I don't particularly like Hari Raya because of all the wastage and excessiveness that people including me go through. We buy too much tidbits and too much delicacies hoping that guests would come... but people don't usually eat so much... so it's just for show.

Then of course when we all congregate at my grandma's house, it is very disturbing to see the clothes that people wear... see through, body hugging... and the excessive make up and made up nails... It saddens me.

But apart from that, I am happy to have met some of my aunts and uncles whom I love so much... plus I got to see my granny and kiss her.

I'm just waiting for the chance to go out with Hubtobe for Hari Raya and take photos with him. =) I miss him too. Hari raya will be different in the coming years once we become permanent additions to each other's families.

Burning the Holy Book...

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Astaghfirallah... 

I pray that they do not go ahead with the burning of the Quran... 

Do they not see that the Holy Quran has references from the Bible too? That the Holy Quran honours and puts Jesus in high regards? 

One of the five pillars of Islam states that we must believe in all the holy books sent down to man from Allah and that includes the Torah and Bible too and never have Muslims burnt those books... so why do they have to burn something they do not understand?

These people who want to burn the Quran... have they even read it once in their lives? But more importantly, have they even read their own book enough to say that both books are not from God? Na'uzubilla...

I am too far away to do anything but it pains me greatly that this is going to happen. 

Only Allah knows what's the best punishment for such a sin.

A little Housekeeping

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I finally did it- I changed the layout of my blog!!!

It was a bit of a heartache at first when I changed it... but now I feel that it's more... me.

I love a good cup of coffee anytime and it also represents me sitting down, pondering and musing over stuffs. Coffee as a stimulant for my musings. Heh. 

I also added a few more blogs to my following. I'm really happy to be able to have access to all the other muslimahs out there; tap on their wisdom and experiences. Alhamdulillah.

The house is finally in a clean condition- windows cleaned, toilets scrubbed, floors vacuumed and mopped, mirrors and ornaments wiped, bedsheets changed and curtains hung. Truth is, it is tiring to do all these by myself but I do it because of Allah and I do not whine when my mother asks me to do it. I only get angry when my brothers and my dad are sleeping away or watching tv and not helping out. But then again, more pahala for me!

It's 6.15pm and my mother has finally finished cooking. Alhamdulillah. She has to cook for my grandma too since everyone will be congregating there tomorrow. She's been up for 48 hours straight but I know she's doing this for her family and for Allah. May Allah reward her for her efforts.

I am hoping perhaps I could go for Eid prayers tomorrow morning. My dad wants to leave home after subuh prayers. I would love to go but I am not sure if the mosque they are going to will have space for females to pray (sometimes the men use the female area too) and also, my mom might need my help tomorrow to iron the clothes and prepare lunch for everyone. But I will ask her later.

I am quite upset that I missed the last 7 days of Ramadan because of my monthly crimson visit. I felt so lost, being unable to perform my solat, my terawih and even the qiamulail prayers at night. So maybe that's why I turn to doing housework and helping my mother out as much as I can to make up for it.

As Ramadan finally comes to an end, I feel very sad knowing that the spirits of our dead have to return to their graves to continue with their torture. When the takbir is sound on the last day of Ramadan, it brings tears to my eyes- for those who have passed on and for myself.

These past two Ramadan I have asked myself what have I done this year that was different and better from the last?

Alhamdulillah, I think this year I have become a better person; always in remembrance of Allah and slowly relearning as much as I can about my religion. Insyaallah, next year will be better.

May we begin this Syawal with much forgiveness for our past sins to each other.

Amin.

The men don't get it....

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Men should help out more at home... no matter how tired they are from work... because women who work also have to go home and work some more in their unpaid household labour. Aaii... I could go on about the sociological implications of that but in another entry perhaps.

But women, having been exposed to chemicals used to do laundry and for household cleaning as well as the occasional cuts while cooking and all that, this is what happens to their hands:


They crack.
They peel.
They get sore.
They get rashes.
They get swollen.







Don't you pity our mothers, wives and sisters?

Making friends

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Today after class, a year one girl approached me and asked me where's the musollah. Masyaallah... I was so touched.

Firstly, I was so honoured that she chose to ask me although there were other muslim girls in the class. Maybe Allah has deemed me the right person to direct her. And I am very grateful to have walked with her to the musollah although I can't pray. We talked about school and I gave her alot of advice as a senior to a junior.

Secondly, I was touched in that there are still good muslims out there who still remember to pray. Alhamdulillah... It made me realise that when I was her age 3 years ago... I had never asked that question before. =( I do not want to imagine how much sins I had back then or how many of my fasts were invalid because I did not pray back then. =( It made me sad.

But it also made me grateful that I have 4 very good muslim friends who stayed by me throughout (even when there was a time I wanted to distance from them for they were too halal for me). Astaghfiruallah... May Allah forgive me for that...

They gave me the guidance when I needed it- especially when I first started wearing the hijab and re-learning about Islam again... I am grateful to Allah for destining me to sit with them on the first day of school and for allowing me to have true friends whom I really love very much. Insyaallah we will be friends till we have our own children. Amin.

Laylatul-ala-Qadar

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I apologize that this entry is mostly written in Malay. But the tagline is an interesting twist on the Malay idea of 'ala-kadar' meaning doing things half heartedly or not putting real effort into something.

A friend shared this note on Facebook, so here it is:

Sangat mencabar nak memberikan pemahaman yang mudah bagi sekumpulan belia tentang malam LaylatulQadar. Saya nekad mulakan dengan analogi berbentuk cerita.

Tersebut alkisah sekumpulan pekerja berkumpul di meja Iftar. Salah seorang dari mereka pun bersuara.

“Kau tau tak, Bos kata siapa yang overtime hujung bulan ni dia nak kasi bonus!” “betul ke?”

“Betul! Tapi yang menjadi musykilnya sekarang ini, bos kata siapa yang datang satu hari dari hari-hari tersebut saja yang dia akan beri bonus ni!” “eh, pelik betullah, kenapa begitu syaratnya, ini dah kira siapa nasib baik dia dapat la eh?”

Begitulah manusia, apabila sesuatu ganjaran itu dirahsiakan cara meraihnya, tentu sekali usaha untuk mendapatkannya akan dikira sebagai NASIB. Ertinya tiada perlulah sebarang usaha tambahan melainkan sekadar menanti keputusannya dihujung nanti, kalau kena, kenalah.

Sebenarnya malam penuh ganjaran itu kekal rahsia berabad lama adalah kerana menjadi bukti keadilan dan kasih sayang Tuhan.

Keadilan dan kasih sayang?

Iya, Bayangkan kamu ambil bahagian dalam lumba maraton, beratus pelari yang lain turut ambil bahagian, dihujung sana siap menanti ganjaran bagi yang menghabiskan larian, bahkan jalanraya dibersihkan dan ditutup agar para pelari mudah berlari dan tiada halangan.

Maka begitulah Ramadhan, dihujungnya menanti banyak ganjaran bagi yang menginginkan. Bagi memudahkan kita, Tuhan yang Maha pengasih pun menggari Syaitan dari mengusik agar tidak mengganggu konsentrasi ibadah. Jadi apa alasannya untuk kita tidak memecut lari?

“Mungkin ada dari mereka yang rasa penat.” Sahut seorang dari mereka mungkin memahami perumpaan analogi tersebut.

“Betul tu, maka syukurlah kita tuhan kurniakan 10 malam terakhir sebagai jarak bagi kita mulakan pecutan, dan pasti dihujung nanti ramai yang tercungap kepenatan kan? Oleh itu hanya yang besungguh-sungguh dan yang bersiap fizikal dan mental sahaja yang mampu memelihara stamina mereka hingga ke akhir garisan. Sekaligus meraih hadiah yang layak bagi mereka atas usaha dan kesungguhan yang ditunjukkan.

Soalannya adakah mereka yang tidak bersiap dan bersungguh akan gagal mendapat ganjaran?”

Jawapannya tidak, pasti ada juga yang sampai kegarisan penamat cuma bezanya adalah mereka tidak akan mendapat kedudukan yang baik dalam perlumbaan tersebut.

“hah, tak apalah asalkan kita dapat kan dah cukup baik tu Ustaz!”

“ Kalau begitu awak dah berjaya menanam niat mengejar laylatul-ala-kadar namanya”

“haha, dan bos tu pun tak rugi apa-apa kan Ustaz?” kata temannya.

“Tau takpe.” Jawab Ustaz.

A thief?

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Subhanallah... I found this on one of the Fb pages and I think it is very good. I wish that someone had shown me this when I was younger. But hopefully I could use it for my own children when they get to the stage where they start noticing the opposite sex and all.

The captions:

The girl says: Ya Allah, please protect my heart lest I steal his iman without me realising it. I pray to You, Oh God to strengten my iman and his iman.

The boy says: Subhanallah... she's so beautiful. Please fortify the iman in my heart. Let my presence be a source of strength to this girl's iman. Don't let me be the reason for a decrease in her iman.

Hijab Do's and Don'ts

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I found this very good article to which I will put here as a point of reference to myself and to others as what it means to wear the hijab over your head. Today it has come to a point where I am SO SICK of seeing girls who call themselves muslims using the hijab like a fashion statement and using for reasons OTHER than seeking Allah's protection and His pleasure.

I take a huge offense when I see girls in hijab wearing nail polish or excessive make up- main point: if you're wearing fake eyelashes and a GLOB of liquid eyeliner- odds are you never pray coz if you're gonna give me the excuse that it's 'the time of the month' then wow... you must have your period 365days a year.

Here's a photo that annoyed me:
NO- You do NOT use a cat ear on top of your hijab for the sake of looking 'cute'. It's such an insult to the hijab. Masyaallah... It made me so very angry when I saw this... and more so when it was from the front.







Then there's this:

NO- you do not wear tights under a mini skirt and pair it with a shawl and call it hijab. It says tramp, not muslimah.


And lastly... if I can see your round breasts then that means
you're not wearing a hijab either.







So to the article proper. I am only extracting four of her main points. I took it from this website: http://islamic-world.net/sister/hijab_in_quran.htm

Introduction:

This essay will attempt to briefly yet concisely enumerate the basic requirements regarding Muslim women's dress (Hijab) as stipulated by the Shari'ah (Divine Law) of Islam. The term Hijab, includes not only dress and covering the body, but methods of behavior before members of the same and/or opposite sex, promoting privacy for females and prohibiting loose intermingling between males and females, and thereby encouraging modesty, decency, chastity and above all, respect and worship of Allah. Minor differences exist among the scholars regarding the actual number of the requirements because of varying methods used by them in codifying. The ones mentioned here represent the ones agreed upon by the overwhelming majority of scholars and are all solidly backed by firm evidence taken from the Qur'an, the Sunnah and the practice of the Sahabah (the Companions).

The First Requirement: The Extent of Covering

The dress worn in public must cover the entire body except what has been specifically excluded, based upon the following proofs:

Allah Ta'ala says: "And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and guard their private parts from sin and not show of their adornment except only that which is apparent, and draw their headcovers over their necks and bosoms and not reveal their adornment except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands' fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers, or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women (i.e., their sisters in Islam), or their female slaves whom their right hands possess, or old male servants free of physical desires, or small children who have no sense of women's nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah altogether, O you Believers, in order that you may attain success.[An-Nur, 24:31]

The word zeenah in the aayah above, literally means "adornment", and includes both (a) that which Allah has adorned, i.e., the woman's natural and/or physical beauty, and (b) that with which they adorn themselves, i.e., jewelry, eye shadow, attractive clothing, hand dye, etc. Soorat An-Nur spells out specifically the commands concerning the fact that a woman's natural beauty and her adornments are to be concealed from strangers except by (1) What may show due to accidental or uncontrollable factors such as the blowing of the wind, etc., and (2) What has been exempted (see explanation at end of this section).

Allah also says: O Prophet, Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their outer garments about themselves (when they go out). That is better so that they may be recognised and not molested. And Allah is Forgiving, Merciful. [Al-Ahzaab, 33:59] Abu Dawood narrates that `Aishah (RAA) said: "Asmaa' the daughter of Abu Bakr (RAA) came to see the Messenger of Allah (SAAWS) wearing a thin dress; so Allah's Messenger (SAAWS) turned away from her and said: O Asmaa', once a woman reaches the age of menstruation, no part of her body should be seen but this-and he pointed to his face and hands.

The word khumur (pl. of khimar) refers to a cloth which covers the head (including the ears), hair, neck and bosom. The esteemed mufaasir (Quranic interpreter) Al-Qurtubi explains: "Women in the past used to cover their heads with the khimar, throwing its ends over their backs. This left the neck and the upper part of the chest bare, in the manner of the Christians. Then Allah commanded them to cover those parts with the khimar."

The Second Requirement: Thickness

The garment should be thick and opaque so as not to display the skin color and form of the body beneath it. Delicate or transparent clothing does not constitute a proper covering. The Sahabah were very stern on this and regarded scanty clothing in public as an indicator of a woman's lack of belief. Al-Qurtubi reports a narration from `Aishah (RAA) that some women from Banu Tamim came to see her wearing transparent clothing.

`Aishah said to them: "If you are are believing women, these are not the clothes of believing women." He also reports that a bride came to see her wearing a sheer, transparent khimaar, whereupon `Aishah (RAA) said: "A woman who wears such clothing does not believe in Soorat An-Nur." Moreover, the following hadeeth makes this point graphically clear. Allah's Messenger (SAAWS) said: There will be in the last of my Ummah (nation of believers), scantily dressed women, the hair on the top of their heads like a camel's hump. Curse them, for verily they are cursed.

In another version he said: ...scantily dressed women, who go astray and make others go astray; they will not enter Paradise nor smell its fragrance, although it can be smelled from afar. [At-Tabarani and Sahih Muslim] "Scantily dressed women" are those who wear clothing which reveals more than it conceals, thereby increasing her attractiveness while opening the path to a host of evils.

The Third Requirement: Looseness

The clothing must hang loosely enough and not be so tight-fitting as to show the shape and size of the woman's body. The reason for wearing a garment which is wide and loose fitting is that the function of Muslim women's clothing is to eliminate the lure and beauty of her body from the eye of the beholder. Skin-tight body suits, etc. may conceal the skin color, yet they display the size and shape of the limbs and body.

The following hadeeth proves this point clearly: Usamah ibn Zaid said: Allah's Messenger (SAAWS) gave me a gift of thick Coptic cloth he had recieved as a gift from Dahiah Al-Kalbi, and so I gave it to my wife. Thereafter the Prophet (SAAWS) asked me: Why didn't you wear the Coptic cloth? I replied: I gave it to my wife. the Prophet (SAAWS) then said: Tell her to wear a thick gown under it (the Coptic garment) for I fear that it may describe the size of her limbs. [Narrated by Ahmad, Al-Bayhaqi, and Al-Haakim]

The Fourth Requirement: Color, Appearance and Demeanor

Allah ta'ala says: "O wives of the Prophet! You are not like any other women; if you fear (Allah), then do not be too pleasent of speech, lest one in whose heart is a disease should feel desire (for you)." [Al-Ahzab, 33:32] The reason for the revelation of this verse is not the fear of distrust nor misbehavior on the part of the women, but rather to prevent them from speaking invitingly, walking seductively, or dressing revealingly so as to arouse sexual desire in the heart of lecherous and evil men. Seductive dressing and enticing speech are the characteristics of ill-intentioned women, not Muslims.

Al-Qurtubi mentions that Mujahid (RAA) said: "Women (before the advent of Islam) used to walk about (alluringly) among men." Qatadah (RAA) said: "They used to walk in a sensuous and seductive manner." Maqatil (RAA) said: "The women used to wear an untied cloth on their heads, while provocatively toying with their necklaces, earrings and other ornamental jewelry."

Furthermore, Allah has commanded women not to display their beauty, meaning both natural and acquired beauty. Allah commands the believing women thus: ...And do not make a display of yourselves like the displaying of the ignorance of long ago... [Al-Ahzaab, 33:33] A garment which is intended to conceal a woman and her beauty from public view cannot be a thing which enhances her beauty. Therefore, the garment cannot contain bright colors, bold designs or shiny and reflective material that draw men's attention to the wearer. The Arabic word above, At-Tabarruj, means not only "to display oneself" but also "to spruce up one's charms for the purpose of exciting desire".

Imam Adh-Dhahabi says in his book Kitab Al-Kaba'ir (The Book of Major Sins): "Amongst the deeds which a woman is cursed for are displaying the adornments she wears, wearing perfume when she goes out, and wearing colorful clothes..." Hence, the Muslim woman is encouraged to wear muted, somber colors and to avoid bright designs, patterns and colors. This point should serve also as a reminder to Muslim men who are in positions of responsibility for their women, that Allah's Messenger (SAAWS) has warned in an authentic hadeeth narrated by `Abdullah ibn `Amr ibn Al-`Aas that amongst the three individuals who would not enter Jennah (Paradise) would be: Ad-Dayooth, who is contented with obscenity within his family. i.e., a cuckold-a man who permits the women for whom he is responsible, such as his wife, daughter, etc., to engage in illicit sexual relations or to display their beauty to men, thereby stimulating sexual desire.

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Masyaallah... May that be of some help to us now and the future. Alhamdulillah, Allah has helped enlightened me and given me the Knowledge to be a better Muslimah nowadays. I can only pray that for those stray sisters, may their hearts be open to the right path before it's too late.

Wallahualam Bissawab...