Hijab Do's and Don'ts

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I found this very good article to which I will put here as a point of reference to myself and to others as what it means to wear the hijab over your head. Today it has come to a point where I am SO SICK of seeing girls who call themselves muslims using the hijab like a fashion statement and using for reasons OTHER than seeking Allah's protection and His pleasure.

I take a huge offense when I see girls in hijab wearing nail polish or excessive make up- main point: if you're wearing fake eyelashes and a GLOB of liquid eyeliner- odds are you never pray coz if you're gonna give me the excuse that it's 'the time of the month' then wow... you must have your period 365days a year.

Here's a photo that annoyed me:
NO- You do NOT use a cat ear on top of your hijab for the sake of looking 'cute'. It's such an insult to the hijab. Masyaallah... It made me so very angry when I saw this... and more so when it was from the front.







Then there's this:

NO- you do not wear tights under a mini skirt and pair it with a shawl and call it hijab. It says tramp, not muslimah.


And lastly... if I can see your round breasts then that means
you're not wearing a hijab either.







So to the article proper. I am only extracting four of her main points. I took it from this website: http://islamic-world.net/sister/hijab_in_quran.htm

Introduction:

This essay will attempt to briefly yet concisely enumerate the basic requirements regarding Muslim women's dress (Hijab) as stipulated by the Shari'ah (Divine Law) of Islam. The term Hijab, includes not only dress and covering the body, but methods of behavior before members of the same and/or opposite sex, promoting privacy for females and prohibiting loose intermingling between males and females, and thereby encouraging modesty, decency, chastity and above all, respect and worship of Allah. Minor differences exist among the scholars regarding the actual number of the requirements because of varying methods used by them in codifying. The ones mentioned here represent the ones agreed upon by the overwhelming majority of scholars and are all solidly backed by firm evidence taken from the Qur'an, the Sunnah and the practice of the Sahabah (the Companions).

The First Requirement: The Extent of Covering

The dress worn in public must cover the entire body except what has been specifically excluded, based upon the following proofs:

Allah Ta'ala says: "And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and guard their private parts from sin and not show of their adornment except only that which is apparent, and draw their headcovers over their necks and bosoms and not reveal their adornment except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands' fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers, or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women (i.e., their sisters in Islam), or their female slaves whom their right hands possess, or old male servants free of physical desires, or small children who have no sense of women's nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah altogether, O you Believers, in order that you may attain success.[An-Nur, 24:31]

The word zeenah in the aayah above, literally means "adornment", and includes both (a) that which Allah has adorned, i.e., the woman's natural and/or physical beauty, and (b) that with which they adorn themselves, i.e., jewelry, eye shadow, attractive clothing, hand dye, etc. Soorat An-Nur spells out specifically the commands concerning the fact that a woman's natural beauty and her adornments are to be concealed from strangers except by (1) What may show due to accidental or uncontrollable factors such as the blowing of the wind, etc., and (2) What has been exempted (see explanation at end of this section).

Allah also says: O Prophet, Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their outer garments about themselves (when they go out). That is better so that they may be recognised and not molested. And Allah is Forgiving, Merciful. [Al-Ahzaab, 33:59] Abu Dawood narrates that `Aishah (RAA) said: "Asmaa' the daughter of Abu Bakr (RAA) came to see the Messenger of Allah (SAAWS) wearing a thin dress; so Allah's Messenger (SAAWS) turned away from her and said: O Asmaa', once a woman reaches the age of menstruation, no part of her body should be seen but this-and he pointed to his face and hands.

The word khumur (pl. of khimar) refers to a cloth which covers the head (including the ears), hair, neck and bosom. The esteemed mufaasir (Quranic interpreter) Al-Qurtubi explains: "Women in the past used to cover their heads with the khimar, throwing its ends over their backs. This left the neck and the upper part of the chest bare, in the manner of the Christians. Then Allah commanded them to cover those parts with the khimar."

The Second Requirement: Thickness

The garment should be thick and opaque so as not to display the skin color and form of the body beneath it. Delicate or transparent clothing does not constitute a proper covering. The Sahabah were very stern on this and regarded scanty clothing in public as an indicator of a woman's lack of belief. Al-Qurtubi reports a narration from `Aishah (RAA) that some women from Banu Tamim came to see her wearing transparent clothing.

`Aishah said to them: "If you are are believing women, these are not the clothes of believing women." He also reports that a bride came to see her wearing a sheer, transparent khimaar, whereupon `Aishah (RAA) said: "A woman who wears such clothing does not believe in Soorat An-Nur." Moreover, the following hadeeth makes this point graphically clear. Allah's Messenger (SAAWS) said: There will be in the last of my Ummah (nation of believers), scantily dressed women, the hair on the top of their heads like a camel's hump. Curse them, for verily they are cursed.

In another version he said: ...scantily dressed women, who go astray and make others go astray; they will not enter Paradise nor smell its fragrance, although it can be smelled from afar. [At-Tabarani and Sahih Muslim] "Scantily dressed women" are those who wear clothing which reveals more than it conceals, thereby increasing her attractiveness while opening the path to a host of evils.

The Third Requirement: Looseness

The clothing must hang loosely enough and not be so tight-fitting as to show the shape and size of the woman's body. The reason for wearing a garment which is wide and loose fitting is that the function of Muslim women's clothing is to eliminate the lure and beauty of her body from the eye of the beholder. Skin-tight body suits, etc. may conceal the skin color, yet they display the size and shape of the limbs and body.

The following hadeeth proves this point clearly: Usamah ibn Zaid said: Allah's Messenger (SAAWS) gave me a gift of thick Coptic cloth he had recieved as a gift from Dahiah Al-Kalbi, and so I gave it to my wife. Thereafter the Prophet (SAAWS) asked me: Why didn't you wear the Coptic cloth? I replied: I gave it to my wife. the Prophet (SAAWS) then said: Tell her to wear a thick gown under it (the Coptic garment) for I fear that it may describe the size of her limbs. [Narrated by Ahmad, Al-Bayhaqi, and Al-Haakim]

The Fourth Requirement: Color, Appearance and Demeanor

Allah ta'ala says: "O wives of the Prophet! You are not like any other women; if you fear (Allah), then do not be too pleasent of speech, lest one in whose heart is a disease should feel desire (for you)." [Al-Ahzab, 33:32] The reason for the revelation of this verse is not the fear of distrust nor misbehavior on the part of the women, but rather to prevent them from speaking invitingly, walking seductively, or dressing revealingly so as to arouse sexual desire in the heart of lecherous and evil men. Seductive dressing and enticing speech are the characteristics of ill-intentioned women, not Muslims.

Al-Qurtubi mentions that Mujahid (RAA) said: "Women (before the advent of Islam) used to walk about (alluringly) among men." Qatadah (RAA) said: "They used to walk in a sensuous and seductive manner." Maqatil (RAA) said: "The women used to wear an untied cloth on their heads, while provocatively toying with their necklaces, earrings and other ornamental jewelry."

Furthermore, Allah has commanded women not to display their beauty, meaning both natural and acquired beauty. Allah commands the believing women thus: ...And do not make a display of yourselves like the displaying of the ignorance of long ago... [Al-Ahzaab, 33:33] A garment which is intended to conceal a woman and her beauty from public view cannot be a thing which enhances her beauty. Therefore, the garment cannot contain bright colors, bold designs or shiny and reflective material that draw men's attention to the wearer. The Arabic word above, At-Tabarruj, means not only "to display oneself" but also "to spruce up one's charms for the purpose of exciting desire".

Imam Adh-Dhahabi says in his book Kitab Al-Kaba'ir (The Book of Major Sins): "Amongst the deeds which a woman is cursed for are displaying the adornments she wears, wearing perfume when she goes out, and wearing colorful clothes..." Hence, the Muslim woman is encouraged to wear muted, somber colors and to avoid bright designs, patterns and colors. This point should serve also as a reminder to Muslim men who are in positions of responsibility for their women, that Allah's Messenger (SAAWS) has warned in an authentic hadeeth narrated by `Abdullah ibn `Amr ibn Al-`Aas that amongst the three individuals who would not enter Jennah (Paradise) would be: Ad-Dayooth, who is contented with obscenity within his family. i.e., a cuckold-a man who permits the women for whom he is responsible, such as his wife, daughter, etc., to engage in illicit sexual relations or to display their beauty to men, thereby stimulating sexual desire.

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Masyaallah... May that be of some help to us now and the future. Alhamdulillah, Allah has helped enlightened me and given me the Knowledge to be a better Muslimah nowadays. I can only pray that for those stray sisters, may their hearts be open to the right path before it's too late.

Wallahualam Bissawab...

On becoming a hijabi

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

It is just shy of 3am and I am here, unable to sleep and feeling philosophical and random. This usually happens when Hubtobe is working night shifts and I've just put down the phone after talking to him for 10minutes on the phone.

I tossed and turned for a little while then my mind started drifting to whether I should move the plants tomorrow morning so they can get more sunlight and wondering how I'm going to have to wait 6 months for a new book once I've bought all the books up to date. So random right!

Then I started talking to myself, thinking about sisters I've met at school and how much I've looked up to them especially in the formulative months since the start of wearing the hijab. The more I thought of it, the more I felt I needed to start up the computer just to blog it out.

People have asked me countless times why I decided to wear the hijab and there are actually many answers that I've churned out to different people... but the real truth will always be that Allah has sent me guidance.

I think I've mentioned before that I had been reading a book that shared stories of how women struggled with their decisions to start wearing the hijab. The concluding story came from a professor who recently wrote a book called 'The politics of the veil'. An abridged version of her book can be found here. It took a scholar... a woman who was supposed to represent all things liberal and secular to knock some sense out of me. I do not know Professor Katherine Bullock personally, but I am grateful to her for writing the thesis and I pray that Allah will bless her always and be among those He loves.

When I first started to wear the hijab, I went in straight with the 45inch tudung because I did not believe in the 'trial' period some women go through where they put their scarves backwards but expose their necks or just wear a cap just enough to cover their hair. But no. When I decide to do something, I research on it, make sure I'm going to do it right and armed with knowledge. That's what I did.

According to the Quran, Surah An-Nur, verse 31:

وَقُل لِّلْمُؤْمِنَاتِ يَغْضُضْنَ مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِنَّ وَيَحْفَظْنَ فُرُوجَهُنَّ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا ۖ وَلْيَضْرِبْنَ بِخُمُرِهِنَّ عَلَىٰ جُيُوبِهِنَّ ۖ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا لِبُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ آبَائِهِنَّ أَوْ آبَاءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَائِهِنَّ أَوْ أَبْنَاءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوْ إِخْوَانِهِنَّ أَوْ بَنِي إِخْوَانِهِنَّ أَوْ بَنِي أَخَوَاتِهِنَّ أَوْ نِسَائِهِنَّ أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُهُنَّ أَوِ التَّابِعِينَ غَيْرِ أُولِي الْإِرْبَةِ مِنَ الرِّجَالِ أَوِ الطِّفْلِ الَّذِينَ لَمْ يَظْهَرُوا عَلَىٰ عَوْرَاتِ النِّسَاءِ ۖ وَلَا يَضْرِبْنَ بِأَرْجُلِهِنَّ لِيُعْلَمَ مَا يُخْفِينَ مِن زِينَتِهِنَّ ۚ وَتُوبُوا إِلَى اللَّهِ جَمِيعًا أَيُّهَ الْمُؤْمِنُونَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ

And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband's fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex; and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss.

And also from Surah Al Ahzab Verse 59;

يَا أَيُّهَا النَّبِيُّ قُل لِّأَزْوَاجِكَ وَبَنَاتِكَ وَنِسَاءِ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ يُدْنِينَ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِن جَلَابِيبِهِنَّ ۚ ذَ‌ٰلِكَ أَدْنَىٰ أَن يُعْرَفْنَ فَلَا يُؤْذَيْنَ ۗ وَكَانَ اللَّهُ غَفُورًا رَّحِيمًا

O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that they should cast their outer garments over their persons (when abroad): that is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not molested. And Allah is Oft- Forgiving, Most Merciful

I use Yusuf Ali's translation but I know this verse above has variations in its expression of meanings according to different translators but the main point is the same.

At the same time, my decision to wear the hijab was resented and even forbade by my parents. Astagfiruallah... I remember spending few nights crying about it. I even asked my closest friends what to do and they were very supportive and kind towards me. I did not discuss it with Hubtobe, strangely when I think about it on hindsight. I guess I did not want him to think that I was doing it for him.

So with unsupportive parents and all, I went looking for a role model I could emulate or learn from. At first I read alot of hadiths about Saidina Aisyah r.a. because she is one of the women I admire. But because she is not in person for me to observe, it was very hard for me to learn.

When I started school that semester, I became very observant of the sisters I met. I'd watch how they'd behave in the musollah... I listened to how they spoke, how they greeted each other and how they responded to sad or good news. It was like learning a new language. No one taught me all these real life islamic things, despite having gone to madrasah for 6 years. For example, I had no idea what jazakallah meant or why people said syafakillah when someone was sick. I didn't even know what the initials r.a. behind Saidina Aisyah's name meant!

But Alhamdulillah, at that time, one of my good friends became the vice president of the muslim society and I am very grateful she is one of my close friends. I asked her alot of questions and she was so kind and helpful. But I could not follow the way she dress simply because she likes to wear shawls but I don't coz I have a round face (laughs!).

Then, I went on facebook and got the shock of my life when I saw two of my acquaintances through the muslim society married! And they were still studying! Masyaallah... At first I could not understand... but as I looked at the pictures, I looked at their parents... then I understood. This was a family raised with Islam at the centre of their lives, their hearts. I felt a tinge of envy perhaps for the privilege they've had. =(

I remembered when I met this particular sister during one of our meetings, I was struck by her beauty and her fair face. I hadn't thought anyone would be so beautiful when they were covered up and yet she was. She was soft spoken and kind and gentle... the kind of woman I thought I'd never be. But when I began to wear the hijab, she became a sort of role model for me. She was married, at 21 and leading a life steep in religion and I admired her alot for it.

So I learnt by observing her when we meet in the musollah for prayers... I asked her alot of questions and slowly, I tried to be what she was simply representing- a muslimah; a woman who loves Allah.

I do consider myself more independent nowadays... plus Hubtobe is always there to remind me when I do something wrong. But I still hold high regards for this sister. It amazes me how one can be married, yet doing so much charity work, going for classes and other activities with other muslim sisters and so on.

I am still learning and I hope to increase my iman... a step at a time. And although she's unaware that she's been like a mentor to me, I pray that she will always be a source of ilmu and inspiration for other sisters (and of course her children in the future, insyaallah).

So, it has been a year now for me since I've put on the hijab and I have never felt better. Though sometimes I complain its humid, I feel naked without it. My parents have also accepted that I'm adamant about wearing the hijab and I think they realise that I've changed alot from what I was before and I know they are thankful to Hubtobe for it. =)

But there are times when I think about my past and cry about it... especially at night. And that's when it hurts the most. Wearing the hijab, doing daily prayers, fasting on mondays and thursdays when I can and going for tajwid lessons don't seem enough for me.

So I am thankful that Ramadhan is coming... and I pray that Allah preserve me in good health to be able to perform more terawih prayers this year and may I have the strength and the heart to pray for repentance this Ramadhan.

As Saidina Ali a.s. said:

"The sin that makes you sad and repentant is more liked by Allah (SWT) than the good deed which turns you arrogant."

"A sincere repentant: (1) is ashamed of his past sins (2) takes up the duties overlooked and fulfils them (3) makes good the willfully ignored conditions of a trust managed by him (4) forgives those who provoke him (5) does not demand repayment of loans from those who are in financial distress (6) makes firm determination not to sin ever again (7) surrenders his self to the adoration, devotion and service of Allah (SWT) when it had swelled to the point of exploding due to inordinate consumption of worldly pleasures, transgression and disobedience."

Wallahualam Bissawab.

Remembering the battles

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

It is 6.15am. The alarm clock rings; signalling that it's time for subuh. Snooze.
It's 6.30am. The alarm clock rings again. Snooze.
By the time it gets to 6.45am, I tell myself either one of these two phrases:

1) I'll just do it when I wake up at whatever time later
2) I must get up or else Allah will be angry with me. xf azan subuh "solat is better than sleeping"

So each day it's like that... a battle to wake up especially for subuh prayers. Sometimes I wish we had something like this in college.

I vaguely remembered the first time Hubtobe dragged me to a mosque. I can't remember which one exactly coz we've been to so many. But I remembered the feeling of shame and stupidity when I saw others around me all covered so decently and behaving like as if the mosque is their home- their comfort in the house of God, humbled me.

I remembered trying to recall how to do my ablution and then later how to read my tahiyat akhir... it was very challenging and I remembered going home, finding my book on solat from my primary school days and learning all over again.

I also remembered the shock when after Maghrib prayers, I saw everyone around me getting up and doing prayers even though the iqama' wasn't announced yet. I was scared and confused. Only later did I ask Hubtobe what was it and he said they were doing solat Rawatib. Phew! But after a few months, I did dare myself to try doing the Rawatib; especially so when I'm in the mosque. Truth is... the more solat you do in the mosque, the more you feel at home in it... and I suppose that was the feeling I saw on the women's faces the first time I went to a mosque.

At that time, I still had not put on the hijab and trust me... women in the mosque DO give you THAT kind of look when you enter without covering your hair. Despite wearing a turtle neck and long skirt, I felt naked... and naked was how I felt each time I went into mosques... and the nakedness feeling continued even when I was in public.

I remembered going to the library because I felt so lost and so exposed. There, I picked a book entitled 'Why I started to wear the hijab' and I spent the whole night reading and crying over it.

I didn't tell Hubtobe about my experience the night before and I think I surprised him one day when we met and I was wearing the hijab already. And despite the humid weather, I was really happy to be covered. I remembered being so happy that day when we went to the mosque to pray Asar and Maghrib.

I have alot to thank Hubtobe for... it was him who helped me walk back to the straight path. He never forced but always spoke kindly and gently even though I was sometimes stubborn and defiant.

I remembered during the first few months, he would sms me every few hours to ask if I have performed the required solat of the day. It annoyed me alot but it was also like a reminder. Furthermore, I couldn't lie to him... I felt that if I lied to such an honest soul, God would double my punishments.

But now... more than a year has passed and Hubtobe does not need to remind me about anything anymore. And I'm grateful.

People always ask me why do I love him so much even when he has much imperfections (don't we all?) and I wish I could tell them... that I love him because he has helped me reconcile my true love which is for Allah... but they are not ready yet to understand this because they have not reconciled their love for Him.

There is more that I want to learn and even more that I want to learn together with Hubtobe.

Insyaallah, that time will come sooner. Amin.

Making Doa for others

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Recently, I found out that a co-worker of mine is an on-off hijab wearer. I found out when I was looking through her photos on facebook. I tried not to think about it but I was disappointed. So I told Hubtobe and he told me that I should not be upset with her for her transgressions, but instead I should pray for her; may Allah open her heart to wearing it fulltime. He said that at least she is trying to wear it than not at all.

Hubtobe is always like that... he likes to see the glass as half full rather than half empty; always seeing the good in people and believing that they can change.

At first I was hesitant to make doas for people whom I consider hypocrites. It's not just the on-off hijabies, but also those who wear the hijab but do not pray. They break my heart =( But the worst ones are those who do all the above and still brag about their knowledge of Islam.

But last night, I found some enlightenment. I was reading surah At-Taubah and the meaning scared me so much that I felt humbled and sorry for being upset with these people instead of praying for them to change.

"The Hypocrites, men and women, (have an understanding) with each other: They enjoin evil, and forbid what is just, and are close with their hands. They have forgotten Allah. so He hath forgotten them. Verily the Hypocrites are rebellious and perverse." (Surah 9, Verse 67)

I do not wish for anyone to ever be left behind or forgotten by Allah. Truly, nothing is more devastating than that.

“Tidak beriman salah seorang di antara kalian sampai dia mencintai untuk saudaranya apa yang dia cintai untuk dirinya sendiri.” (HR. Al-Bukhari dan Muslim dari Anas bin Malik)

“Doa seorang muslim untuk saudaranya (sesama muslim) tanpa diketahui olehnya adalah doa mustajabah. Di atas kepalanya (orang yang berdoa) ada malaikat yang telah diutus. Sehingga setiap kali dia mendoakan kebaikan untuk saudaranya, maka malaikat yang diutus tersebut akan mengucapkan, “Amin dan kamu juga akan mendapatkan seperti itu.”

The above two hadith seek to remind me that selfishness is not the way of Islam. Making doa for someone without his/her knowledge gives pleasure to Allah i.e. Mardhatillah such that each time you make doa for a fellow Muslim, the angels say 'amin' for you. Masya'allah!

So back to my co-worker. I prayed to Allah such that He would open her heart and guide her back to the right path once again, to love her as He has loved all the people with Iman... and you know what? I saw her for the first time in our workplace musollah during Zuhur today. Masya'allah... I was so touched.

She never enters there except to adjust her clothes or tudung... but this afternoon I saw her there and her slippers were also wet from ablution.

Allah really hears our prayers...


Reference: http://al-atsariyyah.com/?p=1724