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"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

My mother just got home from the doctor... and she told me that he suspects that she has dengue fever. I'm actually very surprised as to how that is possible. Our plants do not have water holders below them, meaning that water drains out. We don't leave water in pails... so I don't know how she got it. -sigh-

It saddens me on two fronts when I heard this news- first is of course for my mother. She is still young... and so am I and my brothers. Although I can do things by myself now, I do wish for her to be with us as we grow older.

Although her ways are not always the best, it does not mean that I do not love her.

Secondly, I am sad for myself. If my mother is hospitalized... that leaves ALL the housework to me. And that is on top of my studies. The men in the house really can't do much or won't do much rather. I'd have to wash all their disgusting clothes when they could actually do it themselves.

I pray that the blood test is negative and that she doesn't really have dengue and that the rash is just an allergy to something. -sigh- But if it's positive... then it has been decreed by Allah...

Everything happens for a reason... and so I have to accept it.

Planning....

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Alhamdullilah, my recess week is over. Somehow I find myself at a loss with so much free time that scheduling seems redundant. Today is a good Monday morning and so I have a few things to write down just for my own remembrance:

1) I am grateful to have my professor supervisor; even though he is very demanding and very difficult to please. He is very prompt in his replies to my emails and always gives me questions and pointers that make me think deeply. Insyaallah, under his guidance, I will have a better planning exercise and I will produce a good thesis paper. I pray that Allah will make this journey for me a little easier.

2) Today I saw a friend posting something on facebook that went like this- If you have a target to get wed, why not also have a target to go to haj?
It struck me that one. Of course, I would love to go to haj. Another friend commented that it's not just the spiritual and financial preparations but also freeing up time. Hubtobe and I have sort of planned [though hazy] that we should go to umrah, or haj before/during our holidays before we see the world. This is of course subject to whether we marry before or after my masters. But I do so wish to have some time for ourselves to travel and do our umrah and/or haj before the kids come. But then again, I found out about someone who planned to go to haj after her third child has weaned off and they would go before they have a fourth child. Masyaallah.... and they planned this at the very start of their marriage. =)

3) I plan to take it one day at a time. Somehow things are getting harder for me, since that day. Each day to rebuild myself and to have a stronger faith that Allah is the best of all planners.

Insyaallah...

Amin...

Humbling reminder

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Today I came across this ayat in the Quran and thought it would be best to share it here. It reminded me about the Greatness of Allah and how we as humans must never forget that we need Him but He doesn't need us:

أَلَمْ تَرَ أَنَّ اللَّهَ خَلَقَ السَّمَاوَاتِ وَالْأَرْضَ بِالْحَقِّ ۚ إِن يَشَأْ يُذْهِبْكُمْ وَيَأْتِ بِخَلْقٍ جَدِيدٍ

 

Seest thou not that Allah created the heavens and the earth in Truth? If He so will, He can remove you and put (in your place) a new creation?

   وَمَا ذَ‌ٰلِكَ عَلَى اللَّهِ بِعَزِيزٍ

 Nor is that for Allah any great matter.

Just two lines... but so powerful. Masyaallah. I could literally 'hear' Allah saying the last line to Mankind. I actually said 'wow' after reading that line. It's like a slap to my face perhaps, as a reminder that our existence here is only because Allah wills it. Any difficulties and any ease which He gives to our lives are His decisions alone.

This reminds me of a video from youtube that I watched about a poor, blind old lady whom when interviewed about her poverty, never stopped praising God. Here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IFqfVIxGPlY&feature=player_embedded

One of the questions that the reporter asked was: So Ummi, do you have any children? Do they come and visit you? And she said- Allah is always with me, I do not need anyone else.

Masyaallah... truly, the most grateful are those who get so little but are thankful for so much. I pray for that old lady and I also pray that I could attain that level of thankfulness for everything in my life.

Wallahualam Bissawab

Getting into the Groove

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I'm currently recovering from food poisoning and so this week I'm going to be a little slow in thought and actions. After one hour of teaching or studying, it just drains me so much! But before I go and rest, I just wanna lay out some thoughts about the thesis paper I'm crafting. 

Truth is, the process is harder than it seems. And my organized self finds it so difficult to move in a zigzag manner when I see the research process as a linear manner. It involves alot of going out into the field, talking to people, then reviewing the literature, then reviewing your research question again and again and again. That's just so exhausting! 

They say that it is too early to determine anything, therefore, I should not be stuck in my decision to be final. -sigh- I guess as the more experienced professors, they'd know better.

I've got to think alot on my own now... and then I'm going to try and formulate some questions and begin my pilot interviews soon. I'm so shy and I find it difficult to talk to strangers really... Yeah... that means I better get that $150 voice recorder.

Alright, time to rest. This research process is something new for me... but if I find it to my liking, insyaallah then, Academia is for me.  =)

Wallahualam bissawab.

Shukran for this remedy...

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I am thankful to Brother Hamid for posting this entry here.

But I'd like to put up something he shared about the Prophet s.a.w; a beautiful do'a that is full of sincerity, humily and total subordination to Allah... I cried when I read this and i find it so humbling that I am crippled for words to describe it.

 

“O Allah! Unto You do I complain of my weakness, of my helplessness and of my lowliness before men. O most Merciful of the merciful. O Lord of the weak and my Lord too. Into whose hands have you entrusted me? Unto some far off stranger who receives me with hostility? Or unto a foe whom you have empowered against me? I care not, so long as You are not angry with me. But Your favouring help, that were for me the broader way and the wider scope. I take refuge in the light of Your countenance whereby all darknesses are illuminated and all things of this world and the next are rightly ordered, lest You make descend Your anger upon me or lest Your wrath beset me. Yet it is Yours to reproach until You are well pleased. There is no power and no might except through Thee.”
 

Masyaallah...

And something to remind myself....

When someone rejects you in any aspect of life, do not get disheartened, rather rejoice within yourself saying to yourself Allahukaber! Worst could have happened, Alhumdulillah! It didn't happened. My Creator plan's are, indeed better than those of his best of creations (human beings).Its better to get rejected at first place than to get divorced later (in every aspect of life).What have I lost? Nothing! What belongs to me after all that i may loose.


I accept all that He has decreed upon me for He knows best what I know not. 

He has given me this opportunity to increase my faith in Him and search for His love; a love above all else. 

I put all my faith in His plans for they are the best for me and for my religion.

This is how I feel right now...

Soulmates; Is there 'The One' for you?

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Let me start off first with this ayat from the Quran in hopes that we are always grateful to Him for everything and that we are put far away from those who sin, even if it is within ourselves.

 رَبِّ بِمَا أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيَّ فَلَنْ أَكُونَ ظَهِيرًا لِّلْمُجْرِمِينَ

O My Lord! Since You have bestowed favours on me, I will never more be a helper for sinners (28:17).

So, to the topic of the day- 

Does the concept of 'The One' exist in the Muslim vocabulary? How do we make sense of this when Muslim men are allowed to marry up to four wives and that technically, it is forbidden for Muslims to date or see their future spouse before marriage?

Marriage is such an important step that our blessed Prophet (s) spoke of marriage as being `half the religion': `Whoever has married has completed half of his religion; therefore let him fear Allah in the other half!' (Bayhaqi)

This begs the question- Why? 

There's a very simple reason for this. Yes, there is 'The One' for us when we seek marriage with someone... and that 'One' is Allah. 

When I first thought about this idea; it seemed counter-intuitive but then I began to ask myself this: Why do we do anything? We do everything in this world because of Allah and for His pleasure alone. 

Therefore, when you meet someone who reminds you of Allah and who loves you solely for Allah, then you know that this person is therefore right for you. He/she becomes the channel or the bond that helps you escalate your love for Allah through your love for each other. Loving your spouse is loving Allah's creation and thus loving Allah. Furthermore, if your spouse follows the sunnahs of the Prophet closely; the remembrance of our Prophet s.a.w is also another way to build our love for Allah. 

Therefore, do not be swindled by the popularized notions of love professed on Valentine's Day. This [sick] notion of finding 'the one' has not stopped divorce from happening; in fact it has increased the rate of divorce, esp in Singapore. Why? Coz couples realise 'oh, he/she's not the one. Move on'.

‎ 

وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِّتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً ۚ إِنَّ فِي ذَ‌ٰلِكَ لَآيَاتٍ لِّقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ

And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect [30:21]

In another entry here, I mentioned that these 'Signs' always seek to return to the source, which is Allah, the Creator. So what does this tell us? Allah's Signs of His love for us is when we feel love for our spouse because He had put it there. But this love belongs to Him and as such, we must constantly remember to return that love to Him; through our daily ibadahs and also through our daily interactions with our family, our spouse, our children.

It's very simple really. Insyaallah, He will guide those who believe.

O Allah, grant the Muslim youth (men) pious and righteous wives, and make from their offspring Muslims who will rise the banner of Islam, and carry the Quran (in their hearts), and who will order good and forbid evil.


O Allah, grant the daughters of the Muslims pious and righteous husbands, and make them pious, obedient (to Allah and their husbands), repentance, not showing themselves (wearing hijjab).


O Allah, grant the Muslim youth (men) the chastity of Prophet Yusuf (AS), and grant the daughters of the Muslims the purity of Mary (Mariam (AS)).


Amin

May this help us in trying times

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I found this on youtube but looked up the translation somewhere else. May this help us through the trying times. Insyaallah.
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSp_LDfq8HQ
 
It's entitled: Bantulah Aku Melawan Nafsu (arabic)-Mawaddah  [Help me fight my Nafsu- by Mawaddah]
 
 
Do help me fight this lust


I had fought my lust every moment

I tried many times yet I failed

I didn't give up and I fought again

But I couldn't afford

I failed at last



O Lord, do help me, make it easy for me

To fight this lust that is destroying me

Maybe I'm not halted to reach You

Please help me Lord

Have mercy on me, don't let me be



Lord, do help me

Have mercy on me, don't let me be, do help me always

I don't give up, I keep on fighting by hoping help from You



Should You let me be on my own

I'll ceaselessly be in the sinful valley

O Lord, lust and satan always irritate me

Everyday they hold grudge on me whenever I want to be diligent to You



Don't leave me alone

Facing satan and my lust

I want to obey You, I want Your Please

Should You let me be, I'll be down then

Lord I'll try again fighting lust by Your help and Your blessing Lord



In this prayer I count on You

Do bestow upon me love and fear to You

As my guardians from my lust

Isn't it Your Promise to Your slaves?



O Lord, help me focus in my prayer

May I could feel Your Mightiness

Till I see everything is small, but You

By that feeling I hope at last I'll be able to fight satan and my cunning lust



Lord, in my prayer, clean up my soul, make feeble my lust

Do save myself, cultivate feeling of slavery in me

Make it stay put for my entire life

Syukur Alhamdulillah for this application!

 

"In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

I am thankful for the Azan application from SearchTruth because not only does it provide worldwide timing for prayers but it also tells you the direction of the kiblah.

It is very important for people like my dad who works on the ship for most times of the year. I am very thankful that I was able to download this app into his phone and I know that he has been putting it to good use. For example, the other time he was in Korea, it really helped him prepare for the sahur at 3am instead of the 5am Singapore time.


    

    

I really love the app and I really encourage others to download it too since it is for free! But even if it's not, I would definitely download it. May Allah reward the people who came up with this application and may they receive berkahs everytime we use it. Amin.

Death of an influential woman

 "In the name of God, most Gracious, most Compassionate"

Mdm Kwa Geok Choo, otherwise known as Mrs Lee Kwan Yew passed away this afternoon at 5.40pm in her home. See here. Even though she is absent in most of our history books; I feel that she embodies the saying: behind every successful man lies a woman.

It takes a very special kind of woman to understand the difficulties that her husband has to go through as a political leader. She must have kept many secrets and had managed her household well while working in her own law firm.

However, because she was not Muslim, I can only offer my condolences to her family. I don't suppose it is right for me to make doa for her; for she has already returned to the Creator and all is now in His hands to decide.

May she rest in peace.