Alhamdulilah...

Praise be to Allah....

REMARK: YOU HAVE COMPLETED THE DEGREE OF BACHELOR OF ARTS IN SOCIOLOGY WITH SECOND CLASS HONOURS (UPPER DIVISION) WITH A MINOR IN HISTORY

Interesting article

This is written by a feminist professor in response to an article in the newspaper:

Jun 8, 2011

Disturbed by judgment, says Aware

WE REFER to last Friday's report ('Divorce and the attractive woman') and the judgment rendered by the High Court in this case.

The High Court took the view that it was relevant for a judge to take into account the attractiveness of a wife in determining her chances of remarriage when exercising its discretion on whether to grant lump sum or monthly maintenance. The Association of Women for Action and Research (Aware) is surprised and disturbed by this judgment.

While it may be valid to take into account a person's imminent prospects of marriage - for example, where there is evidence that a party intends to marry another party - it surely is not right for a court to go down a speculative line of reasoning as to whether a person, based on her looks, personality, ethnicity, nationality or relationship history, is likely to remarry.

It is, moreover, problematic to assume that an attractive woman is more likely to marry. What are the criteria for deciding who is attractive? Whose criteria are applied?

And on what basis are we to establish a connection between this alleged attractiveness and remarriage?

We hope that this judgment, which dealt with the issue of the bias of the judge in deciding the issue of maintenance, will not be used as a precedent to support such a line of inquiry in future cases relating to maintenance.

This would result in women being penalised and discriminated against if they do not fit normative - and indeed subjective - notions of beauty.

Teo You Yenn (Ms)
Board Member
Association of Women for Action and Research (Aware)

What do I have to say?

The most fair of all judgement is based in the Quran and even in situations that are frowned upon -such as divorces, everything has been laid out inside the Holy Book where true judgements are reserved for Him alone. 

It is most shocking to know that a civil court takes into account a woman's attractiveness (or not) when deciding her maintenance. Who decides what is attractive? What are the criteria and is there a reason behind why one woman is considered attractive and the other isn't? 

Most importantly -Is the court saying that if a woman is not attractive = it's her own fault? 

A woman is married not just for her beauty. 

Abu Huraira (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: A woman may be married for four reasons: for her property, her status. her beauty and her religion, so try to get one who is religious, may your hand be besmeared with dust. 

I suppose you can put a woman's intellect under her property/beauty... so a man might find a woman attractive because she's smart, funny and has a witty personality. 

Thus, I concur with the letter's last line because who are we to penalize God's creations? Surely He has his plans for everything. 

Walluhualambissawab....

Mengaji

Mengaji is the Malay word for reading/learning Quran because of the root word 'kaji' which means to explore, research, study. And truly, reading the Quran is not just about saying the words out loud but learning about it... which is what I've tried to do these past years.

Learning- from the meanings to the 'rules' and grammar of Arab. It's beautiful... and for the fact that I am still in touch with my ustadz and ustazah  for 10 years since I first started to learn with them is wonderful.

Even though the children who come to study at their home change every few years, I am still the one who stayed... and grew together with my teachers and their family. I've seen their eldest marry and held their youngest; belched her a few times and now she's all grown up and very naughty as children are- running around and all.

I recalled how I was one of those young children, with my own peers, learning and reading the Quran together with them... where are they now, these friends of mine? Have they grown into good Muslims and Muslimahs? Insyaallah.

It feels good to return to learning tajwid with my ustad and hearing him read the Quran after a long hiatus...
Some things like these, I will cherish forever.

Amin

It's Voting time!

In a few hours I will be voting for the very first time!

Excited? Just a little. Singapore does need more voice in its parliament. But then again, we are an electoral democracy which means that the elections are just a way to legitimize the authoritarian's rule here. Which is fine for many of us because we see it as so natural.

I shan't even go into this topic. I'm hip deep in my sociology module on state power that I'm having a headache.

So we shall just wait and see how the election goes. Insyaallah, it will go well. May more opposition enter the parliament -an increase in 5% would also be good.

Jealousy; astaghfirualllah...

I've been toying with writing short stories since I was 19... and now I've braved longer stories that cross into novel categories. I will be humble and say that while I have my share of fans, I still am an amateur writer and still learning from some of the other writers within the guild as well as from published authors.

I had this conversation regarding the content of romance novels and sometimes I think it is so difficult at times to pick up a book and NOT see the cover of a man and a woman. I think I've stopped reading cheesy romance novels ever since I was 15. And nowadays if there are sexual content in the stories [even in murder/thriller ones], I just skip the part.

Truth is, some of these writers write the best plot and it's such a shame that they have their characters engage in pre-marital sex... although, I have found a book where sex is only mentioned between the married characters and the author doesn't go into details. Yes, that's good but if you're not married yet, skip that part please. -laughs-

So anyway, today, one of my fellow writers asked me what pen name should she use for publishing and I was a bit taken aback. We had talked about publishing our work together because we write the same genre and I didn't expect her to go ahead with it before me. =(

She's a few years older than me and had built up her reader base for two additional years so I guess she deserves it... and the moment I started feeling jealous... astaghfiruallah... I said to myself, what would my Prophet s.a.w. say? He would say Alhamdulillah for that person. And he would also say that you should not compare yourself to anyone. If you want that knowledge, you have to earn it and work hard for it.

So insyaallah, I will. Being a full time author is something I really am hoping to achieve some day. So for now... I'll have to improve on my writing, do more research for accurate historical backgrounds and then let my imagination develop. Writing takes time to mature and I should be grateful I have this skill and knowledge, instead of being jealous at others for having more of it. =)